But wait a second, does this really make a modicum of sense?

When I interview management candidates, after I have determined the interviewee might be a fit, I always ask: “What comes first, your family or your job?”

Those who immediately respond “my job” move down multiple notches on my scale of suitability if, in fact, I believe this is their permanent sentiment.

For a chance to play in the big leagues, most wannabe executives will do whatever it takes to make the lineup. The smart ones, however, know that just like a good novel, a business career has a beginning, middle and, hopefully, an abundance of exciting last chapters.

When aspiring managers begin ascending the corporate ladder, many work as if the clock has no hands. Toiling away at their desks from early morning to the wee hours of the night is an investment in the future to gain experience, a means to accomplishing meaningful objectives and, yes, to a certain degree, an opportunity to obtain face time, sometimes even vying for the coveted corporate appearance trophy. Those who go for appearance alone, without the meat on the bones of accomplishment, are easily unmasked as having a “big hat but no cattle.”

However, hitting the trifecta of experience, accomplishment and the ability to showcase a “get it done” work ethic makes for the complete package.

Once a manager reaches a certain midpoint in a career and has a few good people working for him, he moves from the role of solo doer to that of teacher and navigator who can successfully direct others along a process from point A to point B. Appearances are secondary at this point, as the key is what is in the package, not the wrapper.

During this stage, the middle manager should have that “aha” moment recognizing that business is not an all-or-nothing proposition and he can get a life. I admired any employee working for me who without equivocation would state he could not meet with me at a time that I requested because of another important commitment, which could be attending a kid’s ballgame or a first school play. This communicated volumes to me about the manager’s character and ability to balance priorities and make appropriate choices that fit the circumstances.

On other days, however, I would see this same manager looking like death warmed over the next morning because he just pulled an all-nighter to get the needed task done.

A real game-changer occurs when one reaches the ranks of senior executive with a team of players in the anteroom who are more than ready, willing and able to answer the bell. This gives the leader the opportunity to plan rather than just do, calling the signals instead of responding to them. Priorities change as the executive becomes a dreamer — a visionary who can look beyond today to tomorrow, identifying the future challenges and opportunities, and positioning the organization to respond to them.

In many respects, this is both the best of times and the worst of times. The best is that the leader has others to do the heavy lifting. This provides the executive the time to make other contributions, not just to the company but to his family and community, as well. The worst-of-times component is that the buck stops at the leader’s door. Important decisions have to be made daily, and that pressure can take a toll both mentally and physically. At this point in a career, the need to balance becomes something that is just not nice but necessary to endure the pressures at the top.

An all-time best fast-food jingle positively asserted, “Hold the pickle; hold the lettuce. Special orders don’t upset us,” with the payoff line of “Have it your way.” The secret of having it your way in business is learning when and how to balance a career with a fulfilling personal life.

From Smart Business Michael Feuer, reach him at mfeuer@max-ventures.com.

Valerie Fitzgerald specializes in luxury residential real estate in Beverly Hills, Bel Air, Brentwood, Santa Monica and Malibu. Valerie has more than 20 years of real estate experience and is known for her solid reputation in the West Los Angeles brokerage community. She’s also the author of the book published by Simon and Schuster Heart and Sold: How to Survive and Build a Recession-Proof Business. Buy it here.

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On this call you will learn how I’m using newsletters and how you can:

• Expand your brand to increase presence.
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• Connect with current clients to keep them posted on things changing in the marketplace.

I’ll share the success I’ve had using newsletters and will explain the proven formula I use for each email blast I send to clients and contacts.

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Celebrities and the well-heeled are becoming more socially conscious – sharing their time, leveraging their power in the press and redefining what luxury means in the process.

Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher in new 2010 Prius. Birthday gift from Ashton to Demi.

On Wednesday, Ashton Kutcher bought wife Demi Moore a brand new Prius for her 47th birthday – trading in her ’04 model. Many would think what an unlikely gift from one superstar to another when Ashton could buy his wife any car in the world. What statement is the couple making? Perhaps the environment only has so much time if we don’t change how we treat it.

Time is precious and it’s a limited commodity. In the last year you might be finding yourself spending more time trying to make ends meet, close a deal, make buyers and sellers come to agreement. You also may have spent more time being disappointed or frustrated.

On the positive side, think of this as a time of learning and reflecting what’s most important in your life. When your life is stripped down to its essentials and the superfluous is removed we become more creative with our minds and our time.

Have you found yourself spending more time with the family at home instead of traveling? Finding time to read a book that’s been on your shelf for the last six months? Are you developing a closer relationship with a loved one because you are both developing the skill of cooking at home?

How are you spending your time differently these days?

What changes has it made in your life?

Whether you are looking for a solid real estate investment, need a residence in Los Angeles as your U.S. home base when you visit family, children and clients, or seeking a maintenance free primary or secondary home with the most modern amenities and 24-hour concierge access/valet/doorman…The Carlyle Residences are the answer.

The high rise luxury condominium offers its residents 24-hour white glove concierge service modeled after a luxury hotel.  Amenities include a fitness center designed by The Sports Club L.A., a private wine cellar and dining room, club room, a custom designed Chihuly glass sculpture and furnishings by Fendi Casa, as well a separate staff quarter units so they can also live on the property.

Watch these videos to catch a glimpse of what living at The Carlyle is like. For the rest of the videos visit The Carlyle Residences on YouTube.

The Exterior

The Lobby

The Pool

The Carlyle Residences are represented exclusively by Valerie Fitzgerald, a Beverly Hills real estate broker who has more than 20 years luxury real estate experience in the West Los Angeles area. For more information visit The Carlyle Residences.

The Carlyle Residences
10776 Wilshire Boulevard
Los Angeles, CA 90024

Model Residences Open: Monday to Friday 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. and Weekends 12 to 4 p.m.

To Schedule an Appointment Call: 310-209-0000.

The Valerie Fitzgerald Group specializes in luxury residential real estate in Beverly Hills, Bel Air, Brentwood, Santa Monica and Malibu. Valerie has more than 20 years of real estate experience and is known for her solid reputation in the West Los Angeles brokerage community. She’s also the author ofHeart and Sold: How to Survive and Build a Recession-Proof Business.

We work so hard to have it all: a beautiful home, a loving partner, a successful job and more. But what happens when these successes don’t equal happiness in our lives and we’re left feeling unfulfilled, unsatisfied and unhappy? How do we get onto the road that leads to happiness? And what are we looking for?

It’s common to be unsure about what makes us happy, says psychologist Dr. Robert Holden, director of The Happiness Project in England. “Actually, it’s fair to say that often people don’t know,” he says. To help people figure that out, Dr. Holden runs Happiness NOW. The eight-week course enables participants to embark on a personal development journey to figure out what happiness means to them and how to find joy in their lives.

At the beginning of the program, participants are asked to make a list of possessions, achievements and events they hoped would bring them joy but didn’t. “We thought we knew in the past what made us happy, but that’s not always the case,” Dr. Holden says. “It’s quite difficult to know what makes you happy if you don’t really know yourself very well.”

According to Dr. Holden, you feel happiest when you do begin to get to know who you truly are. “The reason why we’re so interested in happiness is because we want to have an experience of our true self,” he says. “That’s the only reason we really want to be happy. We want to feel that lovely feeling of having no worries: You don’t feel pressure and you don’t really have to compare yourself to anyone. You just don’t have to be somebody.”

Keep in mind that if you’re looking for a person or place to truly make you blissful, you’ll be searching endlessly. “We’ve forgotten where happiness really is,” Dr. Holden says. “It’s your original nature. That’s why authenticity is the key to happiness—because the more true you are to yourself, the happier you’ll be.”

When you stray from the idea that happiness is inside of you, you start turning to people and things to make you happy, Dr. Holden says. “We’ve put happiness outside of ourselves; we’ve put it into our job, into our bank account, our relationships,” he says. “You’ve become so preoccupied with the search for happiness that you’ve actually forgotten that you’re already happy. Searching mode makes happiness external: It’s an outward-directed activity. Following your joy is an internal one.”

Once you focus on finding happiness inside yourself and you’re in tune with your authentic self, how easy is it to remain in this state of bliss? “To stay happy, you have to just keep tuning into happiness inside you. That makes it less of a workout, which requires blood, sweat and tears. Lots and lots of effort.”

By Stephanie Mitchell

This is an excerpt from the second step of Keith describing Eight Steps To Instant Intimacy. . .

After reading the subhead to this section, you may be thinking, Keith, you’ve gone to far. I’m not prejudiced!

Oh, but you area. We all are. We all make fast and furious prejudgements of others. Consider what happens every time you walk into a roomful of people. You look at someone, they look at you, you size each other up. You’re judging each other.

Prejudice is a simple part of being human. This is the way our minds are designed. Think about it this way: Every day we are inundated with information. Stereotyping is a shortcut that allows the brain to operate day to day in a world overflowing with information. Thousands of years ago, rapid-fire assessments of “Friend or foe?” probably saved our ancestors’ lives. As a result, we’re all both victims and prepetrators of prejudice.

In today’s complex social environment, where we’re meeting countless people, we make wrong judgments all the time. We’ve all met someone we thought we didn’t like, and then later, once we’ve gotten to know them, discovered that we like them enormously and that our initial impressions of them were dead wrong. Some of these people even end up becoming our close friends.

But wait, you think. I’m willing to admit I have prejudices about new people I meet, but I certainly don’t have them about anyone I would consider from my inner circle. Guess again! I can pretty much guarantee that you hold preconceived notions even about your closest friends. Those prejudices are a major reason why so many of us have so few close friends or trusted advisors.

On a larger scale, business organizations, too, have cultural prejudices that get in the way of productivity – sales is dismissive or marketing, marketing is disrespectful of the folks in research, finance seems to hate everyone, and everyone hates the human resources department. And the company as a whole is too often suspicious of customers and their unreasonable demands.

Which is why I believe the best people skill to practice upon meeting new people is to walk into every situation with as few assumptions as possible. If anything, expect the best, and look for ways to express your interest in and concern for the other person.

Eight Steps To Instant Intimacy

1. Create an Authentic Environment Around You Suspend Your Prejudices
2. Suspend Your Prejudices
3. Project the Positive
4. Share Your Passions
5. Talk about Your Goals and Dreams
6. Revisit Your Past
7. What’s Keeping You Up at Night?
8. Future Fears

The Valerie Fitzgerald Group specializes in luxury residential real estate in Beverly Hills, Bel Air, Brentwood, Santa Monica and Malibu. Valerie has more than 20 years of real estate experience and is known for her solid reputation in the West Los Angeles brokerage community. She’s also the author of Heart and Sold: How to Survive and Build a Recession-Proof Business.

This is an excerpt from the first step Keith describes in Eight Steps To Instant Intimacy. While I could list in detail all eight, I find it most strategic to focus on one of the elements for the day. I plan to share the other seven in the future. I’d love to hear how you share and reveal your authentic side to others or within the workplace.

Create an Authentic Environment Around You

Authenticity is really about who you are. Take my aunt Rose. She was the kind of person who just made you feel welcome when you walked into a room. You always felt like she was on your side somehow. She was someone you would love to have in your inner circle – the kind of person you could be completely open with and still feel safe.

So how do such people do it? It actually pretty simple. And each of us can do it, too. It starts with authenticity – the art of getting real.

“The hardest challenge is to be yourself in a world where everyone is trying to be someone else,” said the poet E.E. Cummings. It’s true.

Authenticity is about knowing who you are and not trying to come across as someone or something you are not. It’s about getting outside yourself and attempting to genuinely connect with another person.

Have you ever walked into a room completely intimidated in advance, having psyched yourself out before you got to the door? The first step is to get grounded.

Take a deep breath. Relax. Let the other person see who you are and what you have to offer – your concern, your interest, your passion, your intelligence, your skill. Listen to that authentic inner voice. Meditate for several minutes or just take a few deep breaths. Exercise, sometimes can help you empty your mind and find that inner voice.

Eight Steps To Instant Intimacy

1. Create an Authentic Environment Around You Suspend Your Prejudices
2. Suspend Your Prejudices
3. Project the Positive
4. Share Your Passions
5. Talk about Your Goals and Dreams
6. Revisit Your Past
7. What’s Keeping You Up at Night?
8. Future Fears

The Valerie Fitzgerald Group specializes in luxury residential real estate in Beverly Hills, Bel Air, Brentwood, Santa Monica and Malibu. Valerie has more than 20 years of real estate experience and is known for her solid reputation in the West Los Angeles brokerage community. She’s also the author of Heart and Sold: How to Survive and Build a Recession-Proof Business.

Click here to view the embedded video.

The penthouses at The Carlyle are sensational and the views stunning….check it out!

About The Carlyle Residences

These new Los Angeles hi-rise luxury condos on the Wilshire Corridor are an oasis in the modern world. The Carlyle Residences from ELAD Properties, developer of NYs Plaza Hotel, brings the most anticipated new luxury construction to L.A.

Incredible volume with 11 ft ceilings, spacious layout, 3bd/4.5ba, private elevator foyer, gourmet kitchen by Poggenpohl with Miele appliances, stunning city & ocean views. 24-hr concierge access/valet/doorman, fitness center by Sports Club/LA, pool, private dining, wine cave, lounge, entertaining room with full catering kit. Grand 2-story lobby featuring Chihuly & Fendi CASA.

To preview the property contact the sales office at 301-209-0000.